Silver Linings

Arrange marriages always befuddled me. The thought of spending your life with someone you don’t know seems weird. And though I belong to a country where arrange marriages are still a pretty common thing, I tend to be a little apprehensive about the whole concept. Not that they are bad in any way. It’s just that when you meet someone, they will obviously show you their good side. Who knows what creepiness hides behind that smile.

My parents just completed 25 years of their marriage and all my life I’ve been fascinated at how these two, despite being poles apart in personalities and temperaments, have managed to stay together and sane. These two are probably the perfect example of opposites attract.

They were set up by their parents through a newspaper matrimonial column. They met a couple of times and god alone knows what they talked about cause these two agreed to the match pretty quickly.

Though in those times people rarely allowed the girl and boy to meet often before the wedding, my grandparents were pretty open in their thinking and these two often met at ‘The Host’ in Connaught Place for tea. Those were days when there were no Starbucks or Café Coffee Day’s. So meeting over Chai and Pakora’s was their date.

There was no phone at my dad’s place so he used to call my mom from work. They couldn’t have talked much because my mom tells me that in those days, call rates were quite high. In this age and day we have Skype and Whats app and endless other ways to communicate with someone. But 20-30 years back, when there was barely a landline phone in every home, getting to know the other person was a humongous task.

After 6 months of courtship, they got married with much pomp and show.

Over these 25 years, I’ve seen my parents going from a simple middle class lifestyle to luxury cars and Rado watches. Not that I was there for all these 25 years. But this is what I remember. They’ve worked together and built a solid foundation for me and my sister.

I still don’t understand how these two have over the years maintained their sanity. I’ve never seen them fight. I mean yeah, they argue about stuff, but I’ve never seen them scream at each other or bang doors. And that is because strangely, every time one of them is in a bad mood, the other one makes himself scarce. Like they avoid each other till they cool down and then have lengthy discussions.

And when I say lengthy, it means I could have a round trip to the moon by the time they finish. These two just looooove discussing things elaborately.

I know I’m too going to have an arranged marriage, because believe me no normal person in his right senses would date me. If in these 24 years of my life I couldn’t find a guy, despite there being more guys than girls on this planet, I can very safely say that my parents would have to make a huge effort to find that one guy who can handle the craziness that is their daughter. 😛

And though this arranged marriage thing scares the shit outta me, I find solace in the fact that if these two could be together and make things work and celebrate a silver jubilee, then maybe it won’t be that hard to make place for a person in your heart even if you don’t know much about him.

Life will be like a mystery then. Unfolding new things about each other every day and making it work together towards that much dreamed about happily ever after. Despite all the thunder and clouds, maybe I too can find my silver lining.

Advertisements

Soulmates

She sat down under the huge banyan tree. It was at the very edge of the cliff. Sitting under that tree you could see the entire valley spread out like a painting in front of you.

She loved coming here. It was their spot. He had brought her here on their first date. She had found it odd when he told her that they were going away from the city for their first date. Usually people chose a nice restaurant or a coffee place.

But the moment she laid her eyes on this place, she knew that no other place could have created the magic that this place did. They sat there for hours, talking away on random stuff.

He had a brilliant sense of humor. Though he looked like a serious type person, he was a lot more fun to talk to.

They started dating and both got on like a house on fire.

She was the non emotional type. Fun, bubbly and never actually getting serious in life or in relationships. He was the complete opposite. Serious and nerdy. He never made many friends and preferred to stay alone.

Both of them in the very beginning of their relationship understood that each wanted different things from each other. He was in for the long haul. Falling more and more in love with her with every passing day. She on the other hand was just casually dating.

She tried explaining it to him innumerable times that she was phobic to commitment and would probably never commit for life. But he always just smiled and changed the topic.

Nevertheless they were together. Like chalk and cheese they were completely opposite. And this was probably the reason they went along so well. They filled each other’s gaps and completed the picture together.

She slowly started getting him out of his shell and his influence made her more practical and patient.

They were the perfect examples of the theory which says opposites attract. And eventually she too fell in love with him.

Sitting under that tree today, she remembered the day he was to come to her place and ask her father for her hand in marriage.

She had barely slept last night and she impatiently walked up and down the hallway waiting for him.

She ran towards the door when she heard a car pulling into her driveway. Her dad welcomed them home and within the next 6 months they were married.

Together they built a marriage which lasted nearly five decades. She loved him with all her heart and laughed at herself, thinking how childish her thoughts on commitment had been.

He was there with her through every up and down and they together sailed their ship through the sea of life.

She was lost in her memories when she heard somebody call out to her from behind.

“Grandma, come let’s play!”

It was their 2 year old grandchild. She smiled at him. He has his grandfather’s eyes.

She took out a single red rose from her bag and laid it under the tree. It was his favorite flower. He often bought bouquets of fragrant crimson roses for her.

It has been 7 years since he left them for his heavenly abode, and every year, this day she comes here and relives that first date. The fateful day when she met her soul mate.