No Regrets

Long time back, when I was in school, I was addicted to those Agatha Christie novels. I used to read them like crazy and I believe I must have read all of them.

One of my favorite of her books is “After the Funeral”; A mystery of revolving around the murder of Mr. Richard Abernethie and his sister Cora.

I don’t really remember all the character now but I remember at one point this guy asks his sister, “Don’t you have any regrets?”, and she calmly replies, “It’s a waste of time, having regrets”.

This dialogue has been stuck in my head ever since. I read numerous other novels after this one but no other dialogue ever appealed me as this one did.

Regret. Those sad disappointing feelings that sometimes feel like they are piercing your heart.

So many times in life we fail to do something which ultimately makes us regret that moment for years to come.

Logic, society, common sense, manners, fear and god knows what all has stopped us from doing what we always wanted to do.

I’m sure all of us can count the incidents in our life we regret. Things we didn’t say, and decisions we didn’t make.

I don’t know about everybody else, but I’ve had my fair share of things that I for a long time regretted. A long list of things I wanted to do and feelings I wanted to express.

There was a point in my life when my list of regrets was longer than my list of things that made me happy. And each of those regrets were like a wakeup call for me.

I remember somebody telling me, that one day your whole life would flash before your eyes. Make it worth a watch.

I didn’t want my life to be a bundle of regrets, so I decided to just let everything go and do what my heart wanted.

Over time I’ve committed massive blunders, made horrible mistakes and made a complete utter fool of myself in front of strangers.

But I also know that in spite of all this, I made some absolutely fabulous friends, found my passion in life and did what my I wanted to do rather than what everybody else expected me to do.

And today, years after I made that decision, I stand here happy and content. I’ve realized that after all these years, I really don’t give a damn if somebody thought my choices were wrong, or if somebody did not liked the way I dressed or if somebody absolutely hated the way I talked and considered me a blubbering idiot.

Everybody around you will always keep telling you what to do and what not to do. I’ve had my parents and friends and neighbors and random people I just met tell me what I should do in life.

But at the end of everything, and with all due respect to each one of them, I made choices that I felt were correct for me. Even if they were wrong I knew that these were the choices I made and hence I’m the only one responsible for anything that ever happens to me.

All that matters today is that I did what I wanted to and that deep down inside me I know that I’m very happy.

Every single regret that we have in life is because of a simple fact, that we were not able to stand up for our happiness. It takes guts to do what you want to do and when you know everybody else is against it. But somehow I’ve seen that it is easier to go against ever body and do what your heart tells you to do than to regret it years later.

Take risks in life. Either you’ll get what you wanted or you would gain an experience which would be more valuable than anything else in this world.

Fall in love with some body and tell them about your feelings. If they do love you back then spread that happiness everywhere. And if they don’t love you back then fall headlong into a tub of chocolate chip ice cream and emerge back stronger.

Love what you do. And if you can’t love it, then ditch that stupid job and do what you love.

Dress the way you like. If you like what you’re wearing then just don’t give a damn to what others think.

Try new places to eat. Who know what food heaven you might end up finding.

If you really want to buy those funky looking shoes then go running toward those neon pink pumps. They might be super duper expensive but it’s OK to be broke once in a while.

Listen to what your heart says. Do everything you like to do. It’s your life. Do what you want to do with it.

Because someday, when you are 80 and are looking back at your life, you should feel like you’ve utilized every god freaking day and have lived your life to the fullest.

At the end, when the curtain are about to fall,you should have no regrets.

Making Mistakes

A life spent making mistakes is not only more honourable  but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. ~ George Bernard Shaw

 

I read something on Facebook today that got me thinking. It was “Make mistakes now. Making them later will be too late.”

We all make mistakes in our lives. Some small and some so big that they end up changing the entire track of our life. We always try not to make mistakes and do the best possible to avoid them. But they always creep up behind our back and wham! They are there. smirking smack at our face.

But as quoted above, a life without mistakes is a life with nothing done. Though I don’t believe there is anybody who has not made mistakes.

Then why are we so afraid of making mistakes? We know they would nearly always happen. Then why the fear?

I have made big mistakes in my life. And when I say big I mean B-I-G mistakes. And the biggest reason for this was that I was trying to not make a mistake. And in this process I ended up turning my life upside down. At that point of time I thought that this was the end of my life and I have absolutely nothing to look forward to. I came to a dead end.

But today, when I look back at those times in my life, I smile and realise how strong those mistakes made me. I had never been the ‘serious in life’ type. I still am not. But that dead end gave me the nudge that I desperately needed to get myself back on track and grow up. It made me realise how I am the only person who can help myself.

It made me lose the fear of making mistakes. Now when I want to do something I just do it.  I know I may screw up some things in the process, but what the hell! At least I enjoy life to my hearts content. Because I know that not doing something would  just make me regret it.

I’v stopped looking at them as mistakes. They are lessons that life taught me the hard way. Lessons that I really needed. My mistakes have been stepping stones in my life. I’m glad I made them. Because they are what made me who I am today.

I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed. ~ Michael Jordan

A Life Lived Well

They say when a person grows old and realises that his life is about to end soon, he can clearly remember everything that happened in his life. All the choices he made, the decisions he took, the joys and the sorrows. But what he remembers and regrets most is all those things that he did not or could not do.

What was done is over, but what could not be done is what makes you realise how things would have been so different if only one had the guts to go ahead with what his heart wanted to do.

Family, money, ego, fear or anything that stopped him from doing what he most wanted to do. It’s ironical how you realise all this when you can do absolutely nothing about it.

But, the thing is, if we all know this, that we might end up regretting not doing something, then why don’t we just follow our heart?

I am hopefully nowhere near death, 😛 but there are things that I really regret not doing. It’s not that I did not do anything that my heart said. Believe me I’v had a rocking life, but there are still things that I wished I had done without thinking too much about their consequences.

Yes, life would have been different today had I made a different decision. Today, as I sit back and think about my life, there is this long list of things that I realise I wanted to do in my life but for some reason I never did them.

For example, I always wanted to learn how to play the guitar. I had the opportunity and I still have a guitar at my home but I’m just too lazy to pick it up and learn something. And this also includes the piano. I started learning the piano, learned some stuff, but for some reason still unknown to me, I stopped mid way and till now I’v not learned the whole thing.

But what I regret the most is not saying sorry when I knew I was wrong but my supreme ass of an ego always got in between and I kept sulking. I wish I had the courage then to kick my ego and just say sorry to the people  who meant so much to me, but I lost them because of the non communication which resulted chiefly because of me 😦 .

Today, I take this opportunity, to apologise to everybody who was hurt because of me. I’m sorry for being such an ass.

Even if nobody forgives me (which in some cases I can totally understand because I’v been a complete jerk), I can have the satisfaction of at least trying to make things better again by agreeing that I was wrong.

Yes, thing would never be the same. I know just an apology would never be enough but we would have the memories of all the good times. So that maybe when I celebrate my hundredth birthday, I can happily look back at all those good days and say, that yes, it was a life lived well…..

 

 

PS- Yamaha, if you are reading this I’m really sorry for being such an idiot.

 

 

PPS- Yamaha was my closest friend. And no, his name is really not Yamaha, it’s just what I call him. 😛